"Hello this is Dave from Wimbledon. This is a message to the rather annoying pregnant lady who was on my tube this morning dangling to Victoria. She stood over me tutting all the time hoping that I'd give up my seat to her because she's pregnant. Well lady, it's not my fault you're pregnant and I have got a seat for the first time for ages. I don't see why I should have to give it up and also as you noticed I was rubbing my knee, I've got a bad knee. So no, I've no sympathy for you whatsoever. Seeing about yourself at the duff(?). Ok this is Dave from Wimbledon. Thank you. Bye."
spoken through SpinVox
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